After a neighbor's idling car left a puddle in the street
Dad:Lisa's car peed. [pause] No, not for real.
Becca: Cars don't have penises.
Noah: No. They only have wheels.
Answering the phone while Becca is at work
Mark: Hello?
Becca: Are you alive?
Mark: Um... yes.
Becca: Because there's a 36 year old cardiac arrest coming in and I wanted to be sure it wasn't you.
Mark: I'm alive.
Becca: OK, good.
Noah: I drank all my root beer. I won the race.
Eva: It's not a race.
Noah: Is it a contest?
Noah: I'm going to lie on the floor to see how tall I am. [lies down] I'm about this tall.